Life On The Edge

Suicide is the 12th leading cause of death in the United States. In 2020, 45,979 Americans died from suicide, from an estimated 1.2 million suicide attempts.

The elusive questions are what leads suicide, what can be done to stop it, and are we doing enough.

On Thursday, May 26, Rhianna Brand, a suicide survivor, will share her story and her journey. Brand is a loss survivor, and a three-time suicide survivor. She has been diagnosed with Complex PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome) and describes her childhood as “very traumatic.” According to pediaa.com, the main difference between PTSD and Complex PTSD is PTSD usually develops following a single event of trauma while Complex PTSD involves several traumatizing events on a long-term basis. She says her entire childhood lead to the Complex PTSD diagnosis.

Her mom was an alcoholic and her dad had his own demons.

“I love my dad, but he had PTSD from Viet Nam,” she said.

The stresses of life followed her into adulthood, impacting her decisions and her relationships.

“I have ended up in multiple abusive relationships,” she said. “I just didn't know any better.”

At the age of 16, she was in a relationship where she just wanted to feel loved. Since becoming a mother, she has had suicidal thoughts, but did not attempt suicide.

“It's the action that needs attention,” she said.

Her journey has also included developing coping skills, and relationships with people she can completely be herself.

“We need to have these. We never know what is going to bring us to our knees in life,” she said.

She said the QPR (Question, Persuade, Refer) is important. It is more likely to be used than CPR, she said.

“You're not weak for asking help,” she said.

She said one of the biggest challenges is the “cowboy up” mentality. She stressed there is no such thing as “pulling yourself up by the bootstraps.” The real cowboy-up is to help your neighbor. She also attributes her faith to a significant part of her recovery. She uses the Bible as a guide in life. Unconditional love is a asset as well, “knowing that I'm here for other people,” she said.

Going through trauma changes a person's outlook on life, sometimes the change is an asset.

“When you go through trauma, it makes you more alert,” she said. “I'm able to notice things more than others.”

She said the symptoms she's experienced “are very hard, but very beautiful.”

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention states that the rate of suicide is highest in middle-aged white men. In 2020, men died by suicide nearly four times as often as women. White men accounted for nearly 70 percent of suicide deaths in 2020; almost 53 percent of all suicides in that year involved firearms.

Brand will be a guest speaker at the Elevate community conversation event on May 26 at Sidney High School. The program is scheduled for 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. at the high school auditorium.